Saturday, March 24, 2007

What type of guy do YOU like?


Three times this month, I've been asked,

"What type of guy do you like?"

And I respond,

"The type that gets things done."

I get blank stares.

I throw them for a fucking loop, they have no idea what I'm talking about....

Because they THINK I'm going to say, in our Manhunt/dlist search-a-profile lifestyle:

"Oh, I like dark-haired masculine straight-acting...."

"Twinks, total twinks..."

"Latinos, Italians, Arabs..."

"Top. I MUST HAVE a TOP."

No.
Me? What do I want?

I want someone who pays the bills on time.

I want someone to help run errands.

I want someone who can pick up the check every now and then, literally and figuratively.

Some people get it, some don't.

There are a lot of fucking assholes out there.....(and this is a generalization), but usually, the prettier they are, the more of an asshole they are.

Because we LET the pretty boys be assholes. We let them treat us like shit, because we're happy that a pretty boy is giving us attention.

The pretty ones tend to be the worst in bed. They think that it's enough that you're ALLOWED to lick their dick. They have never had to work in bed. They're like pretty logs.

Turn them over and fuck them. Tell them not to speak or move. After you come on their ass, give them bus fare and tell them to hit the road.

There's a sign in the Knotty Woodpecker, something like;

"It doesn't matter how handsome he is, some other guy is tired of putting up with his shit."

So true.

We hang on their every word. They're used to people listening to them and their stupid drama stories.

We listen because they're pretty.


They're used to people giving them tons of attention; they become self-centered. We create these monsters. The pretty ones won't ask YOU how YOU're doing. It's all about THEM.

Well, fuck THEM!

Who are the good guys to date?

They're not always that pretty. They go to work. They're accountants, social workers, maintenance guys, etc.

He may not have a fabulous job, he may not make a lot of money.

But he knows when to stop after a couple of drinks.

He doesn't check out other guys when he's with you. He's not cruising on-line constantly.

In bed, he makes sure that you're happy.

He takes out the garbage.

He makes you feel like you're the most important person in the world.

He's the keeper.

When you find him, hold onto him. In the big picture of life, he'll book the flights, and make sure that you sit on the aisle, the way you like. He'll help with the funeral arrangements when a parent dies. He'll be there to help take care of you, and you him.

And that's what it's really all about, folks.

Suck his dick. SUCK IT EVERY FUCKING NIGHT! Suck it every night like it's the first time you've ever sucked dick!

Learn to be happy with him and just him. Appreciate him.

Don't lose him, the good guys are few and far between.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is SOME HUDSON BATHROOM in that pic!

Gotta creep around the alleys todays trying to spot those curtains...

Aaron said...

they are probably bitchy assholes because of their alcoholic pill popping mother that idolized them as a child and got them everything and anything they wanted.

Anonymous said...

"What type of guy do you like?"

?

??

???

Since when do we have to pick just ONE?