Staff at GayHudson.com "manning" the phone linesThe GayHudson.com corporate telegraph machine (everything in this fucking town is an antique!) has been bouncing off the wall with messages about Stray Bar.
Since our fact checker was in NYC for the Gay Pride parade this past weekend, we had NO IDEA of how to confirm any of the rumors!
(well, I guess we could just email Peggy and find out what's the deal....)GayHudson.com received the following. Rumors! Rumors! It's all just RUMORS!
1. The upstate economy is SO BAD, that upstate New York labor is now CHEAPER than Indonesian children and Chinese prisoners. Stray Bar will be converted into a PocketBook Factory. The pocketbooks will continue to be sold in WalMart.
2. The Red Dot will buy the Stray Bar building and open up a new restaurant with a FULL VEGETARIAN MENU! It will also be called, the "Red Dot". Although now, the "Red Dot" will be in reference to the "Bindi", or the red dot worn on the foreheads of Hindu women and men, in this mostly vegetarian culture.
3. Animalkind will buy the building, and keep the name of the bar, "Stray". But the word will no longer have the meaning of STRAY = STRaight + gAY. Instead, "Stray", will refer to the stray animals Animalkind plans on keeping inside.
The "Hudson Society for the Preservation of Stray", in conjunction with Hudson B.O.O.B. (the Hudson Bottom Owned and Operated Businesses) held a meeting last night and decided to try to preserve the Stray Bar and its identity.
For instance, Latin Night at Stray will continue to be Latin Night. Although, someone misunderstood....
The following flyer was posted in town:
LATIN NIGHT AT STRAY BAR!
Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre?
Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?
Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?
It's all just rumors folks. We may never know the truth....
Like I said, we could just email Peggy and confirm if the building is for sale.
But, GayHudson.com will leave that level of quality journalism to the "Register-Star".
7 comments:
Why preserve something useless thats not worth preserving ?
OUCH!
Rich, I just tried telegraphing you but your line is down. I have fresh gossip from the Realtors Ball afterparty! Give a shoeshine boy a nickel to run up to the clock shop over Historical Materialism -- and have that guy look at it for you. He can fix it, but he might have to go on eBay to find the parts. Holy molasses, it could take you a month to get up and running again.
Aggie
From the 6/29/07 issue of THE WEEK:
A good week for GEESE,
"... with the discovery of a link between foie gras, the delicacy carved from swollen livers of force-fed geese, and human diseases including Alzheimer's, diabetes, and rhematoid arthritis."
STRAYbar for sale? Pleeze, Sugarpuss, this is Hudson: EVERYTHING'S for sale, depending on the offer.
Remember, gentle readers: no kissing, and get the money up front.
Will you please tell that old broad to stop telling people I can fix anything? She is under the illusion that I fix everything from accordians to zithers -- but I run a CLOCK REPAIR SHOP, accredited by the ACDAA. So the next time you run into a hag on a bench in the seventh street park that tells you to bring your broken victrola to me, please tell her to FUCK OFF.
Stray Bar is for sale, the Savoia is for sale, the Flying Frog is for sale, Maxie's is for lease, (... Pizzeria) is looking for an arsonist... I could go on but this real estate talk just isn't sexy...
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