Friday, February 29, 2008

49 Cents

MINUS ONE.

Most of this blog, I make up shit.

My real life is way too boring, no one would read.

But, sometimes, real life is too good, and even I couldn't make it up.

Like, this story, totally TRUE.

I get a notice in the mail, I owe the City of Hudson tax money, a couple of hundred dollars. It's a slip of paper, with the amount hand-written.

I owe X dollars and Y cents.

When I was writing the check out, I didn't have the hand-written slip of paper in front of me. I remembered the dollar amount, but didn't remember the cents.

I just rounded up and paid the next full dollar amount.

Fine.

The check is cashed a week or so later...all is good.

About another week goes by, and I get a letter in the mail, from the City of Hudson Treasurer's office. It's a little heavy.

I open it up, and there's a little envelope with FORTY-NINE CENTS CHANGE in it; a quarter, two dimes, and four pennies.

It's not a credit to my account, not a check, but the actual change.

Totally true.


Now, I'm thinking.....can people in town PAY their taxes in cash? Why not?

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Tippy, is this better?

How's this for the opening screen of GayHudson.com?

Are you happy now?

How about this one?

NSFW!

MISs trIXiE I NEed to TalK TO YOU. YoU nEed A lESsON aBouT "Not SuitAble for WorK" MAKe Sure THE ASS sHOtS don'T HiT THE opENinG screEN.

wE dON't NEed To GET PiCTURes oF MAlE hUMAn BUTt ShOVED in ouR FACES EVerYTiME wE opEn GAYHUdsON.cOm At thE MUdDy cUP, OK?
I DOn't WAnT pEople tHINkInG I'm iNtO BeSTiALITy OR SOMETHiNG.

Review of StraightGuysFondled.com

by Diego

StraightGuysFondled.com: Who hasn't feel tempted to sneakily grab a hot cousin's or straight buddy's dick while they slept? Last time I had the urge to clandestinely blowing a half-sleep straight guy was when my sister's boyfriend slept in my room. We are at my parents house so they didn't want her to sleep with her boyfriend in the same room so they wouldn't have sex. But if I had sex with him, it would be okay, I suppose. I had to weigh in the pros and cons of blowing him while he slept. If he woke up would he not mind and pretend nothing happened the next day or would he create scene?


Anyway, Straightguysfondled.com makes it easier to take advantage of sleeping straight cock. The guys are hot and ridiculously straight (no flaming bottoms posing as straight, like in most sites). And here they don't wake up to smack you and put an end to the fun. And one gets a sense that even if they did wake up they wouldn't mind what they saw. They even cum while half-asleep, which is a site I'd never fantasized of but now seems like one of the hottest little fetishes ever: to see a straight guy with his eyes closed, totally oblivious to what or who caused him to cum, letting all that milk out.


They get their asses fondled too by the cameraman, and we also get a peak of them showering at times, through a peephole of sorts. This is gay voyeurism at its best, with a tad of realism too. You may even feel a kind of deja vu: how often do we not attempt to stare at straight men, lusting after what we could never have, hoping we won't get caught. But StraightGuysFondled.com makes it safe to gawk at the prohibited, and to jack off to it too. Knock yourselves out! Highlight videos include Lance, Grant and Jerome. I love me some straight hairy ass, total "no no" zone but you know they want it eaten just as much as we do!
Click here to visit the site.

BREAKING PRISON NEWS!

Im a little behind on my reading material. This New York Times article is dated March 16, 1914.

Tippy says to click on it if you cant read it.

I think that maybe some of my reading material should be donated to the history room at the Hudson Library. Instead of sitting in a box under a booth at the Columbia Diner.

Tippy can I get a tax deduction for donating this? $20 cash maybe? Or a pack of Kools?

So what this goes to show is that Joe Bruno and his present Republican administration in Albany have been looking after us faithfully for a long long time and plan to continue to do so. Though its not very nice that they call us feeble-minded.

I want to see if this Kirsten Gillibrand calls me feeble-minded on Saturday. And if there will be a bar there.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

More Anal Assist

Yes another poll has closed! The poll topic was about what sort of theme party shall we have in Hudson? So heres my anal assist to explain it to you kiddos.

Call this community service if you want to Rose Marie. I know its not the same kind of community service you did in the garage under the Hudson police station to get those DUIs off your record.

Why is the naked man on the City of Hudson sign riding the whale backwards? Is this what they call autistic license? Maybe someone can call the DAR to explain. Someone at the DAR must have been there when this happened. Or ask the present mayor.

Now first Agnes shall anal eyes and discuss the write in votes. Those clever people who emailed Miss Trixie directly to say what kind of theme party they want. Wiseasses. What do they think this is a democrassy?

Here we are. We have one vote for Napalm All South of Warren party. One vote for Bulldoze Bliss Tower party. One vote for Bonfire Across Union Street party. One vote for Strafe State Street party. Eleven votes for Barbed Wire All The Way Down Warren Street party. One vote for Bomb Athens Out of Existence party.

Do you sense any negativity here? Is it just me? Is it a full moon? Ya gotta say this town is in total mutual disagreement over something.

As if the Hudson Police Department doesnt have enough trouble on its hands harassing motorists. And as if the Fire Department doesnt wish they liked their wives more so didnt have to volunteer every weekend.

More write in votes. One vote for Alcoholism Night and one vote for Get Off Your Stool at the Red Dot One Night a Month Night and one vote for Sleep in a Snowbank Night.

One vote for Karaoke Night, and one vote for Love the Developmentally Disabled Hudsonian Night. Ackshully it says Let the Developmentally Disabled Hudsonian Orally Pleasure You Tonight 555-8765.

One vote for Creme de Menthe night. Yum!

These here are all costume nights. I guess. One vote for Second Show Showoffs. One vote for Five and Diamond Gems. One vote for Salvation Army Exemplars. One vote for Goodwill Goodies. One vote for Plaid Night or Most Disliked Mayoral Candidate. One vote for Social Nudism Arrives in a Town Called Hudson (SNATCH.)

How about this. Wear a Costume Get in Free party! Except you wouldnt make any money on the Social Nudism party nights because everyone could just get naked and get in for free.

OK now to the official votes.

Leather and Lace - 3 votes (8%)
I was just reading a soggy Vogue magazine at John Doe and I seem to recollect this is very Thierry Mugler Spring 1987 so I guess this means a retro party. Think WHAM! That Michael George is a hottie. I'd better start shopping at Sals for this one now. Salvation Army dont get much cowture.

Pajama Party - 14 votes (37%)
When some snoop asked Marilyn Monroe what she slept in she replied Channel Number Five. I am with her on this one. I dont own any pajamas either. But I dont have any Channel Number Five either. But I do have some Avon Be Kissable Eau De Toilette Parfum De Spray. So I guess that this party is another SNATCH party. Social Nudism Arrives in a Town Called Hudson. And also it smells pretty!

Insert the gratuitous picture of Hugh Jackman here Tippy OK?

White - 5 votes (13%)
I think Hudson is pretty racially divided as it is with the Greek Orthodontics on one side of the town and the Hindunesians on the other and the Kiwanis on the other. I didnt see Black Party in our voting options or Yellow Party or Tan Party or Red Party.

Ill bet that beeyatch Rose Marie must be behind the White Party idea.

Why not a Green Party? Then we could serve creme de menthe! And support the Parc Bench Foundation.

Military/Uniform - 9 votes (24%)
A natural for Hudson Flag Day! We could show that we support our troops and want them to come home real darn soon.

And there could be a dont ask dont tell booth.

I could recreate a Andrew Sisters routine... with Fredericka and Rose Marie... la la la la both mother and daughter working for the yankee dollar!!!

Hold tight la la la la I want some sea food mama Shrimpies and rice theyre very nice I like oysters lobsters too I like my tasty butter fish fooo When I come home late at night I get my favorite dish fish!

That always gets the boys really worked up if ya know what Im talking about.

Where was I?

Spunk Night - 4 votes (10%)
Coming soon spunk night. Thats a disgusting sophomoric joke. I like it! But someone has to mop the floor later. Oh this must be all the New York degenerates I hear about who voted for this one. But it does support our local Columbia County dairy industry.

Socks Hop - 2 votes (5%)
I think these must be all the same SNATCH nudism people worried about their feet getting all cold at Jasons. So they want a party where they just wear socks and hop. Not a SEX hop.

Whorehouse a GoGo - 10 votes (27%)
This would be the same as last Fridays Whorehouse Party. Except the gogo dancers would be kept chained in cages to keep them from going all out of control tearing clothes off like last time.

Disco Night - 8 votes (21%)
This sounds like straight night. Well I guess ya gotta let them have their fun too just to be fair and all. Saturday Night Fever was the big disco picture and didnt Johnny Travolta star in it and isnt he straight? Isnt he?

Superheros - 4 votes (10%)
I guess this is the Friends of Hudson Stop the Plant party. They are going to have an SLC pinata. Except I dont know how a cement pinata works. Well the climate is different in Tijuana so maybe this is a bad idea.

Dirty Crack Whore - 8 votes (21%)
This makes a lotta sense. No one in Hudson would have to dress up up for it. Not even the Common Council. They would just have to wake up and roll out of bed for it. They could also call this party the Breakfast at the Columbia Diner party.

Kennedy Fried Chicken - 7 votes (18%)
Well this idea makes the most sense with seeing how people in Hudson like chicken so much. Breast legs and thighs. Have I mentioned before that Kennedy Chicken is Halal which means permissible to our Islamic community so they would be would be welcomed at our parties as well? Barack Obama has some nice costumes people are saying we could dress like him for the party. Maybe it should be in November. Its nice to be inclusive. A real home town celebration.

And thats my deep in depth analassist.

So dont play dumb and pretend you dont understand anything or Ill hit you with my purse.

Benefit for Hillary....no, not THAT Hillary

The following came to me from an avid reader:

BENEFIT FOR HILARY

Catskill, NY – Friends of Hilary invite everyone to a benefit for Hilary Manning-Lundy taking place on

Saturday, March 1, at 8 p.m.

The get-together will be held at:

Doubles II, 29 Church Street
opposite the parking lot of the County Building and adjacent to Brandow’s Alley.

Hilary Manning-Lundy, who was diagnosed with leukemia in Summer 2007, has recently received a bone marrow transplant at Sloan-Kettering Medical Center in New York City. As proprietor of Wilder Gallery, Hilary, a village resident, became known in the community for promoting the gallery for innovative art exhibitions and as a performance space. For many years, Hilary resided with her family in Palenville.

Highlighting the benefit will be performances by Voodelic, featuring Earl Lundy; Lynch, with Tommy and Rob Goss, and other special guests. ChrisJohn will be guest diskjockey for the event.
Contributions will be accepted at the door.

Doubles II is Catskill’s newest wine and beer tavern, and entertainment lounge.
For more information, call 518 679-8833.

**************************************************
Trixie's comment is that if this country didn't spend so much money on war, then maybe we could afford a national health care plan!

Tell Obama - National Health Care! Now.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

'disengaged' - m. diver

hudson, new york

lotsa hot girls dancing
jen is down from buffalo
she smells sweet. sweat sweet
girl sweat sweet

-muffy! i'm so glad to see you!
-hey, babe. how's it going?
-cool. can we sit down? i'm so fucked up

we sit
she holds me
her tongue down my throat

-jen? what? where's that from?
-muffy, i missed you so much!

back at my place
robinson street

-wait, muffy, here you want some?
-no, jen, i'm cool

sniff.

hmmm...this is new

-since i left muffy, i've just been having a lot of sex, ya know, like guys, girls, whatever
-oh
-i think i'm bi now.
-oh

sniff.

-and like, it's just sex. sex without feelings, emotions. just fun. ya know?

-right
-you know how it is, muffy, you've worked in porn. you just totally separate yourself
-yeah, i know how it is

she strokes my arm and kisses me

-c'mon, muffy. doncha you wanna do it? finally? after we've waited so long?

- i guess.

Hudson Democrats Fund Raiser

OK, folks, get involved. This event is a fund raiser, see flyer below, but you can just go





Congresswoman Kirsten Gillibrand
will join with theHudson City Democratic Committee
and many of our local and county-wide
Elected Democratic Officials
along with
Supporters, Volunteers, Party Faithful
&YOU!
at a benefit forHudson's Hometown Democratic Party
Saturday
March 1 at 2pm
The Tin Ballroom
(upstairs at Vince Mulford Antiques)
417 Warren Street in Hudson.
rsvp here: hudsoncitydemocrats@gmail.com

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Oscar Night at Doubles

Sunday, Feb 24th at 7PM, Doubles, the gay bar in Catskill, is playing the Oscars on their big screen.

Snacks and fun for the 80th Annual Academy Awards

Friday, February 22, 2008

Will Trixie Make It to Jasons Tonight???

Hey kiddos I heard that Trixies brazilian wax didnt take. I guess in brazil they wax your face. Shes just not a beach girl she got sand in her thong shes heading back up north.

Are you there God?

Its me Agnes.

I know that youre all wondering what an old hooker does in a snowstorm. I was too so I celled Trixie to ask. It sounded like some sort of commotion in the background I think I heard something like federal regualtions say we cant take this aircraft off miss until all you people get out of that restroom.

I myself had no trouble getting to work today. I found an ironing board in an alley and attached it to the Zanichinelli trolley bus. Its called snowboarding. Ive been to WalMart and back twice already. I couldnt get off it.

I passed Gio on Warren Street he was hauling his record player up to Jasons in a Price Chopper shopping cart.

Well we hope that Trixie makes it to her party tonight because she took Jasons bottle opener last week. I think that she thought it was her IUD.

But if Trixie doesnt make it tonight that means more yummy jello tequila shots for me and my new boyfriend. It will be fun tonight either way. As Tippy would say its a win/win.

So God help poor Miss Trixie.

Find her a cab so she can get to Jasons on time. 521 Warren Street. 9:00 pm tonight.

Ill be in the back with my sweetie petutie Clownfacegogoboy!

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Temporary Layoffs! Easy Credit Rip-Offs! Ain't We Lucky We Got 'em!

Like any Long Island princess, Trixie's in Florida this week. I'm flying back up Friday, just in time for the party this Friday night.


View from the spa.


Hotel filled with IT people and accountants. MAYHEM!


Trixie's Whorehouse theme parties are going to start March 14, but this Friday, I figured that people should just have a GOOD TIME.

And I was thinking.....

Good time....Florida.....Florida....Good Times.....ESTHER ROLLE!

(notice the card says, "panties")



Here's to Esther Rolle!

Today's blog post is dedicated to Esther Rolle, for no particular reason, other than she was a great actress and the bedrock of her dy-no-mite family.


My name ain't baby. It's Janet. Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!

See you Friday!

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

MORE PHOTOS from Friday!


By the time I finish with all these photos, it'll be time for our next party, this FRIDAY - Feb 22nd!

WOO-HOO!!

What's the theme? The theme this Friday, is "have a good time", that's the theme.

The next party, after this one, will be on Friday March 14, and then once a month, going forward.

Gio and I have not decided on a theme yet for March.

We're still "debating", as Italians do.


Look forward to seeing you on Friday!

Thank you to Ms. Chiffon for these photos!