Monday, March 31, 2008

Trixie's Whorehouse April 11th

DJ Gio!!! and I are doing another party, Friday, April 11 at Jason's Upstairs Bar

Friday, April 11th
Jason's Upstairs Bar
521 Warren Street
The Hud
$10 cover

Now, to get on the $5 admin list, all you have to do is join the newsletter, see the link to the right, it's really easy. Join the list before Thursday, the 10th at 6pm, and you're on the list. You only have to join once. If you don't do it, then don't complain to me about the $10 admission fee.

I don't wanna hear it. Ya snooze, ya looze!

Got it?

Trixie's Whorehouse is the best fucking party in this town. Gay, straight, whatever... That's why you should go.

It's totally worth the five bucks.

(Who says I need a PR person?)
And it's DJ GIO!!! 's birthday that, pretend to be nice to him.

Oh yeah, and if you need something else to do that week, then you should go to the Red Dot on Tuesday, the 8th and see the film "Flirting with Disaster".

Flirting with Disaster is often how I feel at the bar of the Red Dot on a Saturday night.

Don't shit where you eat folks.

That's my advice.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Just follow the bouncing ball....

These Brits.....they sure do have an odd sense of humor, huh?

Friday, March 28, 2008

"A Fur Coat to Yoga Class?"

True story.

I was at the Sadhana yoga class on Warren Street. The last chant that we all say translates:

"May all living beings be happy and free. And may my own words, deeds, and thoughts contribute to that happiness."


It's the end of the class, I'm all happy and peaceful and then, someone from the class gets dressed and puts on this big, Jennifer-Lopez, white fur coat.

There was NO WAY it was fake. No.

The thoughts are going through my head, "Don't say anything. Don't say anything."

(And even though I'm not 100% vegan myself, I eat no meat/chicken/fish and no animal products. Trixie wears no fur, no leather. Her purse is vinyl, her boots, synthetic - thank you, Payless.)

This was not a coat with a little fur trim, or a small fur hat, it was a big, honking, gangsta fur coat.

And, it WAS a yoga class.

I mean, C'MON!

Again, the thoughts were going through my mind.....

"Don't say anything. Don't say anything."

Then, I looked at her and said, politely (with a smile, even.)

"A fur coat to yoga class?".

She didn't like that.

The quote was, "I got this coat from a thrift store. I am RESPECTING animals by not letting it go into a landfill."

I just walked away.....I shouldn't have said anything....

Club Sandwiches, not Seals

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Club Helsinki Survey - Just Do It!

It's really hard for me to talk about the new Club Helsinki in Hudson without including a Tom of Finland image.

Take the Club Helsinki survey. A little bird sent it to me. Thanks!

Tell them you want more gay stuff, of course.


Jews control the media in the U.S., don't you know that?

Last night, I'm sitting in my hotel room in Almondsbury, England eating a hard cheese and pickle sandwich with vinegar and brown sauce (like, I'm making this up?) and the BBC had a special on Nazi art.

And I was like, "WOW, those Nazis were pretty fucking gay!!"

I mean, LOOK at these guys! Did they KNOW how homo-erotic it is?

Men commissioning statues of gorgeous naked men?


If it weren't for the fact that, well, they were Nazis and killed over 6 million Jews, gays, gypsies, tramps, and thieves, I might actually buy some Nazi art.

But, of course I wouldn't, WWSD?

What Would Sarah Do?

The documentary was on the BBC. You would NEVER have a show on Nazi art in the US of A because, you know, Jews control the media.

With the gays.

Those wuvable, wacky, Nazis!

Would it be anti-Semitic to jerk off to Nazi art? Am I wrong in even asking?

I mean, look at this guy, he's hot, he's attractive, he probably has a nice, decent-paying job at the Mercedes factory....a cottage in Bavaria....

Probably a top.

(Or a big bottom, who'll "just follow orders" from Mistress Trixie. That works for me.)

I'm guessing, a Nazi boyfriend would be an emotional cripple. He probably just shuts down whenever things get a little rough in the relationship.

Then kills the neighbors.

Still, not that much different than the dating pool in Hudson.

Bunch of Nimrods

Woke up this morning, got the Financial Times (yes, I'm still in the UK), and went to get myself a cup of ambition.

The front page read: "Nimrod planned"


"The Ministry of Defense will be urged to consider cutting its losses and withdraw from the Nimrod MR44 programme to provide a new fleet of maritime reconnaissance aircraft."


Is that where we got the word, "Nimrod" from? As kids, didn't you call each other "Nimrods"?

Like, "What are doing, you Nimrod?" Or, is it just a Long Island thing?

We all speak Englsih, but it's different, for instance, I loved it when my co-worker said to me,

"I'm stepping out to grab a fag. Be right back."

I said, "Get me one, too. Make mine 25 and Latino."


OK, here's the deal. My fucking day job has me in the UK.....granted, I'm going to London over the weekend, but during the week, I'm not in London. (And, as readers, you'll have to put up with some non-Hudson related posts...I missed that Irish guy giving a talk on Friday. Send me photos, I'll post them!

I'm not in London, I'm not even in Bristol. I'm in the outskirts of Bristol, in Almondsbury (which sounds sweet like candy, but it's not), in some industrial office park eating beans on toast and trying to stay away from the blood and guts pudding they serve for breakfast.

Yes, they eat this for breakfast....who knows what's in it.

Yes, "blood pudding" is made from blood. Pig's blood, cow's blood, I don't know, it's just blood. And then they get all the innards, like pig-particle board, and put it together and serve it with eggs for breakfast. On toast.

(Maybe it's on the menu at DABA as well. Check. They put lots of dead animal parts on the menu there.)

Last year when I was here, this office park, that used to be farmland, had a quaint little English pub, the "Black Sheep". It was the pub on the farm from day one, maybe when the Romans were here. People were shorter because even I have to duck to get through the door.

this isn't the actual one, but you get the idea...

Well, now the quaint English pub is a Starbucks.

At first I thought, "Oh, us ugly Americans, here we are putting in a Starbucks, changing local culture and flavor, and blah, blah, blah."

I was thinking like some pinko-communist.

I got over it.

Now, I'm like, thank god there's a Starbucks in this town and I can get a decent cup of coffee!!


This was my morning,

I walk into Starbucks (duck to get through the doorway), and ask for a cup of BREWED coffee.

You have to specify BREWED. Otherwise, you get "cafe americano", which is hot water with two shots of espresso....which is not really how Americans drink coffee. (I don't know why they call it americano, bunch of nimrods.)


And the gal says to me, "We don't have any brewed, but we can make it."

I said, "Yes, please."

OK....I know I'm in England, but this is Starbucks, and it's 9 AM, and I have to ask them to BREW some coffee for me?? It's not like they ran out, they just didn't brew it yet....

This is not the first time, either. It's the third time in the past couple of weeks that I have had to tell someone behind the counter of Starbucks, "Yes, I'll wait for the brewed coffee."

WTF? Just brew the fucking coffee!

It's like walking into Dunkin Donuts and saying, "Ok, I'll wait for you to make the donuts..."

Dear God, I really hope I get laid this weekend.

Can you tell?

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

HaHa - you're funny.

You might have already heard this one, it happened last week, after our new governor, David Paterson, was sworn in.

One reporter asked him:

"Have you ever patronized a prostitute?"

Patterson answered, "Only the lobbyists."

OK, we like you. You're in.

Did Spitzer even HAVE a sense of humor?

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

All I did was cut and paste, I SWEAR!

Hiya folks,

This email came to me last's too good to not share it. He wants to be in a video, but maybe I'll use him as a gogo boy for the next Trixie's Whorehouse party? (Friday, April 11th).

Seriously, all I did was cut and paste. I can't make this shit up.

(Plus, I would never even THINK about not closing quotation marks.)

Should we take up a collection to have him come to Hudson? I was complaining about the lack of single gay men, just yesterday....


Oh god, I wanna be in a gay movie so bad so if ya'll can send me a email address where i can see if they can use me in a gay movie please reply here with the email address.

I love it when i meet a gay man or men and they hold me down and spank my bare ass and then tell me they are going to fuck this hot thight wet ass of mine.

I would love to cum to ya'lls spanking party but me being here in louisiana and not having much money that couldn't afford the trip, Especially if i was to be able to meet some good hard gay that has a little "White powder for me to do and after i done a few lines or so they take me and hold me down and strip me naked and hold me over a mans lap and spank me bare ass about 20 times or more and put me in the doggy style and fuck and spank me all at same time.

Heres my pic so you can see me if anyone wants to spank and fuck me :)

Monday, March 24, 2008


Statues outside the train station in Helsinki, Finland

A friend of mine knows someone who got a tour inside Club Helsinki.

Yes, it's fabulous.

No, I don't know when it's going to be done. Don't ask me.

But, yes, it will change the town.

More stuff from Finland.

It will bring hundreds of more people to town every weekend, some of them will hopefully be gay.

Which means that the chances for getting laid in town will increase.

(Yeah, I'm sure it'll bring more money into Hudson as well....)

After a little over a year in Hudson, I think you start "recycling" potential bed partners, or the thought of potential bed partners. There's only a couple of dozen of single gay men in Hudson.

I could probably list them and it'll only take 15-20 minutes. Club Helsinki will bring in new blood.

There's so much riding on Club Helsinki, the owner probably doesn't even realize the expectations we have.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Easter At The Red Dot

Such Sacrilege Last Night! Luckily, Christ died for our sins!
Otherwise, we'd all be going to HELL!
(thanks to Scott for the photo!)


Granted, there's no gay bar in Hudson.....but last night at the Red Dot was quite homosexual.

Why, I think I even saw Truman Capote at the end of the bar.

He would fit right in!

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Who is Jason Shaw? And why don't we need him?

Stickers on 7th, off Union

Who is Jason Shaw? And why don't we need him?

Anyone who's walked over to the Finnish Line on South 7th Street from Warren, has probably seen these bumper stickers on the lamppost.

I had NO IDEA who Jason Shaw is, so, I google'd him.

Well, Jason Shaw is a top fashion model, and you know what, WE DO NEED JASON SHAW in Hudson!

I guess he's one of these guys, they all look alike.


Now, Hudson still doesn't have any INTEGRITY, and we don't have a Versace underwear model, either.

That's just great.

Are you happy now, Bumper-Sticker-Maker?

Thursday, March 20, 2008

I am back from Jamaica

Enough already, what the fuck! Can't Big Momma take a vacation? I know I have missed a few of Trixxie's parties and from the looks of things ya'll should be good and ashamed of our selves… Only white people would be rolling around on the floor in green underwear, licking each others faces and molesting the cute go-go boy! Not to mention the mess that was serving Jell-O shot's (Oh that was Trixie, sorry bitch that yellow weave does noting for ya). Jell-O shot's another "white" only thing; colored folks don't want to disguise the taste of their liquor.
Well enough about that, Big Momma just got back from Jamaica! Let me tell you, it is true the darker the berry the sweeter the juice. Momma had so much sugar running down you chin (watch it) that she felt like a kid in a candy store. Here are some pictures of the men that "rocked" my world!
This little gem, fucked me right in the ass never did that before but thought what the hell!
This one is for the fag's in Hudson...

This one, my look young but let me tell ya he has a yard stick in his pants!

These 3 took Momma around the world and back!

Here are a few pictures of Momma on the beach, isn't it obvious why I had to beat them off with a side of beef.

Don't be haten the player hate the game.
Tucking away the pound I brought back... No I ain't sharing!

Big Momma

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Photos from St. Pat's GAY-LICK Party

Thank you to Lisa for these photos!

Someone lost their contact lens...and their pants.

The next party is on FRIDAY, APRIL 11th! Don't miss out!