Wednesday, December 31, 2008

New Year's Eve at the Red Dot

Tonight at the Red Dot.

Just go. Should be a blast!

Happy New Year, Hudson!

Let's hope for peace and prosperity. Can we all agree on that at least?

Friday, December 26, 2008

WWJD?




Have you seen this video?

OK....let's assume that this reality show is real. It's one of those shows that switch mothers for a week.

...ugh...

Where do you start?

Those poor kids....and that husband?

What would YOU do with her?

Any ideas?

I have a few.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Merry Christmas!

Please don't kill yourself before the holidays.
No one likes a 'Debbie Downer'.


I was watching the news the other day, and there was one executive who killed himself because he lost money with Mr. Maddoff.

I thought....killing yourself right before the holidays....such a drama queen!

Couldn't you have waited until AFTER the holidays? I mean, really....

Then, I though, how sad....

Yes, he lost a fortune, but it's the holiday season, couldn't he have found ONE other reason for living other than money?


The world would be a happier place if there were more blow jobs.
I keep saying it, no one listens...
Who needs money when you're getting blow jobs?
Or, whatever the female equivalent is...Lick Jobs?



Glass half full, ya know?

Six billion people in the world.....half of them live on less than two dollars a day!

They live on less money than the cost of a venti soy latte at Starbucks.

(Every now and then I like to joke about putting a Starbucks at Washington Hose...just to piss people off....it manages to annoy both sides of the argument.)

I'm sure that you can find other things in your life that bring you happiness other than money.

Even here in little old Hudson, there's so much! There's tons of snow and ice, and that's TOTALLY FREE!

Look hard, look deep, and please don't kill yourself right before the holidays.

It's just depressing.

Plus, it's already been done.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

FREE Indian Food at Jason's on Tuesday!


On Tuesday nights, Jason's has FREE Indian food! Yes, free food. It's good, free Indian food. Which, there is no place that serves Indian food in this town. This is it.

Get over there and get some dinner!

Don't say I never told you.

(don't worry, it's not McDonald's).

Monday, December 22, 2008

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Friday, December 19, 2008

Oh, Trixie, where have you been? BUSY!

Sent to me by a dear friend and Hudson resident, MH.


Did you see that they are looking for a new Common Council President?

The Common Council has twenty days to pick someone or else ....bum, bum, bum.....the Mayor gets to decide!

Last week, they called me and said,

"Excuse me, is this the Miss Trixie Starr residence?"


"Why yes, this is the Ms. Trixie Starr residence. How may I help you?"

"Well, Ms. Starr, the Common Council is looking for a new president, and we were just wondering...."

"NO! I'm sorry, I can't do it! Not another social engagement, PLEASE! Can't this town just run itself, anyway? Please, stop calling me! I'm busy!"

"Um..no...um...I wanted to say that we are looking for a new president, so, we have a special meeting planned on Monday, and that we won't be able to attend your Tupperware Party."

Oh.

Fine.


If Madonna calls, I'm not home.
Can someone please feed Madonna, thank you.

Everyone is pessimistic about the economy, but I got a call this afternoon from my Tupperware manager (true story), and she said,

"Trixie, we've noticed that you haven't had any sales lately..."

"Well, I don't know, I think it's just a bad market, and a bad economy and people aren't buying airtight plastic food storage containers as much as they should."

(In reality, I've just been lazy, and if it wasn't wintertime, it's quicker and easier to give hand jobs to married men....hey, it's cash, off-the-books. You want air-tight? I'll give you air-tight...but, that'll cost you extra!)

"Well, actually, Tupperware sales are still up. As a matter of fact, there was a great sale on cookware recently, we've been trying to promote it. I think you'll still sell well."

Oh.

Ya gotta love the Tupperware lady! Even in a recession, she is still sunshine, daisies, and positive energy!!

I talked to my electrician today. Guess what? He's been busy lately! Seems that there's a lot of electrical work that needs to be done in this neck of the woods. There's a stable job!

Trixie's advice on how to survive this financial crisis?

Be flexible.

Be willing to change and bend, and like me, do the jobs that the other gals don't want to do.....

Should I consider Common Council President?

hmmm.....well, they already got a few people interested.....plus, I give enough hand jobs as it is!

:)

Love ya,

Trix

Monday, December 15, 2008

Drag Queens won the GayHudson.com Mrs. Roper Poll?


It seems that my very sophisticated "Mrs. Roper" poll determined this week that DRAG QUEENS are people's favorite part of Winter Walk!?!

"Drag Queens" won over "Kennedy Fried Chicken".

Go figure.

Well....if that's the case, then maybe drag queens should just take over Winter Walk!

Hmmmmmm.......

The first thing I would change is the name.

Good-bye Winter WALK.

Hello Winter-A-Go-Go!!!!

Let there be go-go dancing in the streets!

You don't even want me to THINK of the possibilities! We'd have to come up with a good wintery theme!



I'm sure the idea will meet with some resistance, though....


Just forget it.

The Mrs. Roper poll numbers can't be right. I'm sure it's just a silly mix-up anyway.

Friday, December 12, 2008

CL AD du jour.....Skittles....


THIS IS NOT ME! I swear!

I mean, I like Skittles, but...not THAT much....


**************************************************

hi boyes i love to give blowjobs with some skittles in my mouth it really gets me into it that way you wont forget me..... . plus i love to be fucked really hard... i can also crossdress if your into that...

**************************************************

I don't even have to make this up....

Maybe Skittles because they don't melt?

But wouldn't you choke?

Anyone want to try? I got 50 cents and a dream!


How about Mike and Ike's? Or Mentos? They're vegan. This way, it'll be a cruelty-free blow job!

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Art....

I am so behind on my photo uploads...

These are some of the photos from the weekend before last, the Tom Swope and Carrie Haddad Gallery openings.


Kudos to Mr. Swope for a great gallery opening!


The ancient Greeks and Romans knew exactly what they were doing.


Yes, they called each other beforehand.


I interpreted this as "Minnie Mouse with her hands stuck in a rat trap".
I figured it was a local artist who is opposed to the Taconic rat farms.


There can never be enough photos of naked men.


Monday, December 8, 2008

Gillibrand for Senate? Maybe. Maybe Not.

Hi --

I first posted this on December 8th. I walked into Gillibrand's office this morning, and they confirmed her stance on gay civil unions, not gay marriage (and they re-iterated how EVERYONE should have civil unions, and leave marriage for religion).

--Trixie
January 23, 2009

Ok, another true story...

I logged onto Facebook today and it seems that one of my facebook friends wants Carolyn Maloney to fill Hillary Clinton's Senate seat.

Then, someone commented, what about Kirsten Gillibrand?

The response was, "NO! Gillibrand doesn't support gay and lesbian marriage equality! Maloney does."

Trixie Starr did some investigative reporting today (I'm not going to let my sister Brenda get all the glory!). The sign on Gillibrand's office door on Warren Street says "Open, please come in," so, I did.

Look at that! We have easy access to local government - democracies are amazing!!

Within two minutes, I received Gillibrand's position on gay and lesbian marriage. (It would have been faster if the printer wasn't finicky...)

Here's an excerpt:

"I believe we should have a Federal law that protects all civil unions across America to ensure that gay couples have the right to visit a loved one in the hospital and be eligible for other entitled rights and benefits of committed partners.

The discussion of using the term marriage is more complicated because for many Americans it is a religious right defined as a covenant between a man, a woman and God. Since the Federal government should have no role in dictating religious affairs, I believe from a Federal and civil perspective, "civil union" should be used as the government's definition for all such relationships, including marriage."

The letter then goes on to show her support of anti-discrimination and hate crimes legislation. It's all good.

Carolyn Maloney, on the other hand, supports full marriage equality, and you can read about it here. Just click the link.

Since Prop 8 in California, this is a bigger issue, and we have to make sure that our representatives are on the right side.

Now....for the record, I actually agree more with Gillibrand.

I believe that the government should ONLY recognize civil unions - FOR EVERYONE! Straight, gay, and whatever. Let religion cover marriage and let the government cover civil unions.

But...we don't live in France. And it's going to be a colder day (even colder than today) in hell before heterosexuals agree to relinquish the term "marriage" and go with with "civil unions".

It's a nice idea IN THEORY, but it's never going to happen.

My opinion is that Gillibrand's stance placates the people who don't want to hear the term "gay marriage", and it kinda placates gay people by saying everyone should be civil unioned. It's nice, but...

At this time, we need a more powerful voice, especially after California.

Plus, the term, "gay marriage" - just say it. Big deal.

Gay Marriage. Gay Marriage. Gay Marriage.

Canada, Massachusetts, Connecticut, they have gay marriages, and their societies haven't fallen apart.

Anyway,

I visited my family on Thanksgiving, in Hartford.

My five-year-old niece was playing the game of 'Life' with her friends. My brother turns to me, and with a shrug and a smile says, "Um, it looks like your niece in this game wants to get 'married' to a girl."

I looked at him and said, "Well, it's Connecticut, she can!"

:)

And that's REALLY what it's all about.

My niece will know a world where gay people can get married and we have an African-American president.

There's hope.

- Trix

Minimum Requirements....at least they meet one...

(I found this tshirt on-line...I don't know about it....if you're married, doesn't that mean you DON'T have to jerk off anymore, or is that just wishful thinking?)

Straight gals aren't stupid.

As a matter of fact, us gay guys could learn a thing or two from them.

For instance, I learned last week about the "Three Minimum Requirements", for husband-material men.

House. Job. Car.

Notice, "nine-inch dick" is not in the list. Nor do you find "washboard abs"....just...

House. Job. Car.

There's wisdom in the simplicity. The values and priorities are on stability, security, and long-term peace of mind.

In return, gay men can, and have, taught straight women a thing or two --- like how to give a good blow job. (Rule #1 - NO TEETH! Rule #2 - You can't give them often enough. Rule #3 - NO TEETH! )

Wednesday, in Albany, you'll find the LBGT Professional Happy Hour.

Gay men with JOBS!!! (And careers?) Woo-hoo! I'm there, sign me up!

***************************************************************
LGBT Professionals Happy Hour!

Join us next Wednesday for networking, drink specials, and a chance to win the
bound script of the upcoming highly-acclaimed "Milk" film starring Sean Penn!

Wed Dec. 10 at 6pm at Midtown Tap and Tea!

Invite your friends, forward this event, and we look forward to seeing you!

****************************************************************

At least he'll have a job; one of the three minimum requirements.

He still might end up as a raging alcoholic and drug addict who'll beat you in the middle of the night, have sex with your best friend, and steal your money, but, he'll have a job.

Be careful what you put in the minimum requirements.....

Drag Robbery



It wasn't me.

Hey, I'm still looking for the guy who stole my virginity.

Ba-dum-bah.

Although, I understand why drag queens turn to a life of crime.

I'd like to start a hit mob, myself - a drag queen hit mob!

Death by Aqua Net. It could happen.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Hedda Lettuce TONIGHT after WINTER WALK!



Have fun tonight folks! See you out and about....

OMG....I already have too many photos for you....I'll have more by Monday!

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Wigged-Out Winger Walk with Hedda Lettuce



Oh. Do you know that Hedda Lettuce is coming on Saturday?

Maybe if you never leave the house or visit this website, you might still be clueless. Who knows.

It's been a busy week for me. Contrary to common knowledge, I don't earn a living dressing in drag and giving blow jobs to "straight" married men.

....well, not in the wintertime.

Trixie Starr Enterprises, LLC keeps me busy during the week, building systems that make sure major financial corporations keep their accounts in balance. You know, typical drag queen work.

(and yes, there's more work lately....)

I have photos from this past weekend....give me tomorrow, I'll post them.

Well, I wrote this little piece on the flight earlier this week. Luckily, there's wifi service in this pizza place at a Holiday Inn in Chicago, Now, I can share it with you.

:)

I wouldn't want you to miss it.....

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Tulle Askew

True story....here we go...

It's a Saturday night a while ago and I'm sitting at Rocks, a gay bar in Albany, drinking my Corona and lime, sitting by myself, hoping that maybe I'd get a blow job. “Work and try to get laid”, that kinda sums up most of my existence lately...

The guy slitting next to me turns and starts talking.

"You missed it."

"Oh", I said, "what did I miss?"

"The go go boys. You missed it."

"Oh, that's ok," I said, "They're still floating around."

"This place is always kinda dead."

"Oh. OK.”

(Another person I met at a bar once yelled at me because I wasn’t ENGAGED or showed interest in his conversation….yeah, well, maybe if you weren’t so fucking boring, I’d be interested…)

"Today is my Friday."

"hmmm.." I nod.

"I don't work on Sunday or Monday, so today is Friday night."

"Oh. Really?"

I thought to myself, I was so glad that he explained that, because I wouldn’t have figured that one out on my own.

"This is the only thing to do in town. There's nothing else."

"Well," I said, "you could always start your own party!" I smiled.

He looked at me like I had three heads. That's not what he wanted to hear. My little life-lesson/pearl of wisdom rolled under the bar.

"Yeah, I work in security. Which is the most thankless, under-appreciated job!"

"Oh." I said.

Now, I wasn't about to go into it. I'm not this guy's therapist; I'm not even his friend.

And, like, what the fuck? Doesn't he have a hair dresser or bartender to talk to? Plus, if he's trying to get me into bed, it's not happening. Complaining about your job when you meet someone at a bar is not sexy, little Miss Mary Sunshine. Just buy me a few drinks, tell me I look thin and pretty, and you know what? if you’re lucky, I might just sit on your face to make you - and me - happy. Plus, it'll shut you up and put that tongue to better use.

For a moment though, I had a pang of sympathy. I work with the security guys at Jason's, and they're great. Their job is not easy, I wouldn't do it. Whenever I work with the security guys, though, in a wig and sunglasses, short skirt, tulle askew, my ass half-hanging out, they still give me respect. Ya gotta love 'em.

For instance, true story, there was one Whorehouse party, several months ago, and I was just walking along, in the bar, and this one woman walks by, and snatches my wig off.

I yell at her, “What the fuck? This is MY party, you don’t do this shit”. She throws it at me, then yells back and gets in my face while her girlfriends have to “hold her back”….it was like third grade.

I was not having it.

I would have kicked that fat mullet-haircut bitch right in her Walmart-sweatpants camel toe, but years of yoga practice told me, “Trixie, just get security.”

She was escorted out. Enough.

The security guys were great and they dealt with her, and there was no bitch fight on the dance floor.

I have enough scuff marks on my boots as is, and I don’t need to ruin my good pleather.

Anyway, back at Rocks, in Albany, I’m listening to this guy, because he’s doing all the talking, and I’m thinking, maybe he’s right, maybe working security is not easy and it’s under-appreciated.

So, I sit and listen.

And he complains to me some more about whatever. But, after a few minutes, I get up and leave. His "pick-up lines" weren't working.

Remember...true story...

This morning, I'm at the security check in at the airport, taking my laptops out and putting them in plastic bins (yes, I have two, shut up) and ya know what? The guy behind the scanner says 'Hi'. It was him.

This was the security job. He scans luggage. This was the stressful, under-appreciated security job!

Hey, Negative Nancy, shut the fuck up!

You sit on a stool and stare at a screen to determine if my dildos and soy milk are in plastic zip lock bags, and then have the nerve to complain to ME about me?

I’m glad now I didn’t put out because he doesn’t even DESERVE to eat my 'pussy'! (which, in case you were wondering, tastes like sweet nectar from the Gods – or so I’ve been told!)

Yeah, it's an under-appreciated job, because, DUH, the average person really cannot understand the amount of "stress" you have by sitting and looking at a monitor all day long! What, you're stressed because you're missing "Oprah"?

It's a government job with benefits.....and probably a pension!!! Who gets a pension anymore?

Maybe I'm missing something. Maybe people yell at him all the time. Maybe I should have yelled at him.

Anyway....where was I? What was my point? I don’t know.

I'm having a party on Saturday.

Just go and have fun. And stop fucking complaining. Life is a party!

Dammit.

:)